As I write this, I'm starting to feel the weight of jet lag from recently landing in Shanghai, and this is the moment when deciding to do a weekly blog post summary in addition to all of the daily posts I do on Instagram feels all too much like working on a deadline and less like going with the flow and just having fun on an adventure. The challenge of meeting self-imposed creative deadlines whether I like it or not, whether I feel up to it or not, whether life gets in the way or not, is also a challenge of my commitment to myself and the creative work that flows through me.
As exciting as travel can be, some days are just days I don't want to show up. These days are just as real as all the other days that are full of joyful fun and exploration. I don't want to hide the days that feel like sloughing through mud because they are a very real part of travel. Some days I just want to lie in bed, not go see another neighborhood, or another cafe, or another whatever it is that I will miss if I don't force myself to go out. If I'm not careful or kind to myself, my mind will attempt to override my body, but experience tells me that kind of pushing can result in the body fighting back by getting sick just to get some time to rest. I'd rather just rest and not get sick.
If I'm kind to myself, I heed my body's inner warning system, let go of the ego's FOMO (fear of missing out) related to not going somewhere even if it is only happening on that ONE date and place, and just do the minimum I need to do for a day, and often, one day like that may be all I need to feel rebalanced and refreshed for another round of taking in more new places the next day. Some days, not doing anything just has to be OK. It's a mental health day, a reset day, a day to allow my body to recover and deeply relax. A day to recuperate and let go of taking in new sights. A day of being, not of doing.
This last week was especially full of doing. Traveling across four countries-Norway, Sweden, Finland, and China. Changing time zones twice and now being 6 hours off again from the zone I just settled into last week. A short flight from Bergen to Stockholm, one night in Stockholm, renting a car for a road trip to Örebro, two nights in Örebro, driving back into Stockholm and catching an overnight cruise to Helsinki, one night in Helsinki, and then a long flight to Shanghai. That's a lot of doing and going and packing and unpacking for one week.
Most of the doing and going was because I wanted to squeeze in some Ancestry research in Örebro, Sweden between our time in Norway and our flight from Helsinki to Shanghai, and Alex wanted to squeeze in some extra time in Stockholm and Helsinki. We made it work, but there were definitely moments when I just wanted to rest when he wanted to go out and vice versa. Sometimes we were graceful with each other and sometimes we pushed each other into compromises.
I often feel like I need more alone time than Alex does, and I feel like I recover most completely when I am alone. I feel like my energy gets drained more quickly in environments where a lot of other people are around, versus nature or home environments where I have more personal space to myself. Planes, hotels, cruise ships, and large cities are all very "peopley" places- so I'm due for some good alone time to recuperate.
If you've read this far, thanks for hanging in there with me. I realize it's far more fun to read happy-go-lucky-fun-stuff about destinations than it is to read about energy-draining realities, but I think it's important to talk about the need for down-time as something to build into a travel schedule or itinerary. Even though Alex and I know this, sometimes we think we've planned in down-time, but it doesn't end up being down-time because we need to use that time to work out logistics or do another round of planning for something ahead, so sometimes even down-time ends up feeling more like a work day.
As exciting as travel can be, some days are just days I don't want to show up. These days are just as real as all the other days that are full of joyful fun and exploration. I don't want to hide the days that feel like sloughing through mud because they are a very real part of travel. Some days I just want to lie in bed, not go see another neighborhood, or another cafe, or another whatever it is that I will miss if I don't force myself to go out. If I'm not careful or kind to myself, my mind will attempt to override my body, but experience tells me that kind of pushing can result in the body fighting back by getting sick just to get some time to rest. I'd rather just rest and not get sick.
If I'm kind to myself, I heed my body's inner warning system, let go of the ego's FOMO (fear of missing out) related to not going somewhere even if it is only happening on that ONE date and place, and just do the minimum I need to do for a day, and often, one day like that may be all I need to feel rebalanced and refreshed for another round of taking in more new places the next day. Some days, not doing anything just has to be OK. It's a mental health day, a reset day, a day to allow my body to recover and deeply relax. A day to recuperate and let go of taking in new sights. A day of being, not of doing.
This last week was especially full of doing. Traveling across four countries-Norway, Sweden, Finland, and China. Changing time zones twice and now being 6 hours off again from the zone I just settled into last week. A short flight from Bergen to Stockholm, one night in Stockholm, renting a car for a road trip to Örebro, two nights in Örebro, driving back into Stockholm and catching an overnight cruise to Helsinki, one night in Helsinki, and then a long flight to Shanghai. That's a lot of doing and going and packing and unpacking for one week.
Most of the doing and going was because I wanted to squeeze in some Ancestry research in Örebro, Sweden between our time in Norway and our flight from Helsinki to Shanghai, and Alex wanted to squeeze in some extra time in Stockholm and Helsinki. We made it work, but there were definitely moments when I just wanted to rest when he wanted to go out and vice versa. Sometimes we were graceful with each other and sometimes we pushed each other into compromises.
I often feel like I need more alone time than Alex does, and I feel like I recover most completely when I am alone. I feel like my energy gets drained more quickly in environments where a lot of other people are around, versus nature or home environments where I have more personal space to myself. Planes, hotels, cruise ships, and large cities are all very "peopley" places- so I'm due for some good alone time to recuperate.
If you've read this far, thanks for hanging in there with me. I realize it's far more fun to read happy-go-lucky-fun-stuff about destinations than it is to read about energy-draining realities, but I think it's important to talk about the need for down-time as something to build into a travel schedule or itinerary. Even though Alex and I know this, sometimes we think we've planned in down-time, but it doesn't end up being down-time because we need to use that time to work out logistics or do another round of planning for something ahead, so sometimes even down-time ends up feeling more like a work day.
Our last day in Norway happened to be one of those days we thought would be down time, but ended up being a planning day for dealing with the logistics of what would happen next. We were able to basically camp out at Vågal Kaffe for the day and work until dinner. Luckily we found an easy-to-book and affordable next day flight on Google Flights with Finnair into Stockholm, so we didn't have to drive or train across Norway and Sweden. Not that it wouldn't have been beautiful- but it would have been long and a lot of forest, according to our Scandinavian friends.
After arriving in Stockholm, we spent most of our time in the Stureplan area around the Hotel Kung Carl, which we found a deal on through HotelTonight. The density of pocket squares in men's suit jackets, women pushing baby strollers in lipstick and high heels, and conversations full of name-dropping were thick in this particular area. It's a lot like SoHo or Tribeca would be- so nothing new to me- other than perhaps being surprised that most of the conversations happening around us were in English rather than Swedish.
We ended up getting a Mini-Cooper with Sixt Car Rental to head out to Örebro the next morning, but after seeing so many IKEA stores in the first hour, we finally caved in and went inside one off the highway to grab some snacks. I was surprised to find Swedish Fish in Sweden, since there's really nothing too Swedish about them, but even more delighted to find plenty of local apple cider. Once we got to the Örebro area, we went out to some of the parish churches that held ancestry records to see if there were any graves noticeable in the cemetery that were direct relatives. Unfortunately we didn't find any family graves, but we did have a lovely drive through the area where they lived, and finished off the night with a nice meal in an outdoor cafe.
The next morning we were able to sleep in a little before heading to the City Archives, where many of the parish church records were scanned and archived. I met a great archivist who helped answer a lot of remaining questions for me about how to navigate the Swedish records and interpret different parts of the records, which helped me add a few more definitive generations to my ancestry records. We then took a tour of the historic Wadköping village full of artisan shops and buildings from the 1800s, where we were also able to have lunch before heading out to Hidinge for another church cemetery search that yielded nothing other than nice drives and a stop at Lanna Bokstore Cafe. We also made a stop nearby in Karlskoga, at Alfred Nobel's Bjorkborn estate and experimental labs. The museum was closed, but the grounds were open and still full of surprises and interesting things to read and see about the experiments and tests that he did while staying here.
The next day we headed back into Stockholm to catch the overnight Viking Ferry to Helsinki. People had warned us that it was the "drunk ferry" but we received a great nine-course meal and had a relaxing time in the champagne lounge while almost everyone else on the ship stuck around the bar, casino, and nightclub areas.
Our day in Helsinki started at a very interesting Viking-Finnish designed GLO Hotel Art, a coffee at Roberts Coffee inside the Old Market Hall, and ended with a fantastic view along the water from Cafe Regatta.
At the moment, I'm struggling just to finish this post as my eyes are spending more time shut than they are open. Hopefully next week I'll have fully recovered from the jet lag and fully be on the new time zone in Shanghai. Until then, I hope to be more kind with my body so that it can adjust more easily this coming week!
