“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” ~Maria Robinson
"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves." ~Victor Frankl
You make plans. You make back-up plans. You make just-in-case plans. No matter how hard you plan, sometimes life just has a different plan.
When I was in elementary school, I had planned to be a lawyer by day and a jazz singer by night. When I was in high school, I had planned to be a broadway star. My first year of college, I planned to be a teacher. My next three years of college I planned to be an advertising executive. My last four years of college I had planned to be a music teacher. I never planned to be a photographer, but life had a different plan. Little did I know that everything I had done, even when I wasn't working toward "my plan" was actually preparing me for what life had planned.
My first two years in business as a photographer, I planned to always be able to live in Michigan. Life moved us to Indiana. My second year in Indiana, I planned to always be in the Midwest. Life moved us to the East Coast. One small business, three different locations, in five years. It's fairly well known that it takes two full years for a business to become established, reach a point of sustainability, and gain support in a community. Each time I've reached that second year, my husband has found a better job in a different market, and I have had to start all over again. I'm planning that won't have to happen again for at least 5-10 years.
If I cared more about my job than my marriage, I wouldn't have moved. However, life gave me a wonderful husband when I was planning not to meet anyone, and I continue to embrace everything that comes with being married to him. Life also prepared me from a very young age to deal with change and to learn how to cope as a perpetual new girl. As a child, I was in a new place every 1-2 years, which meant new schools, new people to make friends with, new streets to learn, new clubs to join, and new opportunities to define who and what I wanted to be. I can't even begin to imagine what it's like to live in one place all of your life! In fact, I have yet to know what it's like to live in just one place for more than 5 years!
Just because life may change your plans at any moment, doesn't mean you shouldn't plan. Often, it is by pursuing the plan that you've set for yourself, that you encounter something which is even better along the way. It might not always seem that way at first, and you might be forced to change when you aren't ready for it, but if you seek to make the most of what life gives you - you're guaranteed to live a more rewarding life in the end.
I love this post! Will have to link. I really needed these words. I am married to an academic too. I wanted to plant peonies for years but didn't because they take two years to bloom and if I'm not here, what's the point. I gave in and planted some and will plant more this spring and I will think of you and these words. Thank you!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for this post, Anne. My husband just got laid off and we're in the midst of a change...which may lead us out of California, or keep us here, but neither are situations I can fully embrace. I can't decide where I want to be, and I'm hoping this will be a chance to find out.
ReplyDeleteIf I loved my job more than my husband, I'd just travel constantly. :D
just wanted to say thanks for the desktop image. I love pictures of sky!
ReplyDeleteThanks Anne for your great post. I am also going through a period of change... and I keep trying to control it..... as if I can.... Thanks again
ReplyDeleteKara
Thank you for the advice you gave on my blog! I'd love the names of wedding coordinators. Your photographs are beautiful. My favorite is the one of the couple under the tree that's all lit up. Awesome.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how life (and love!) takes us to unexpected places. I never thought I'd fly 3,000 miles for a first date. And I never thought I'd meet someone who loves me enough to move 3,000 miles to be with. But you're right that sometimes these surprises are better than what you planned, or weren't even looking for. :)